It was an amazing thing to watch 5 young ladies reflect on their lives, write down their dreams and decide how they wanted to move forward  Ellen and I marveled at how they stood up on the final day of camp and declared where and how they wanted to move forward in their lives and in the world.  I love the risk that it involved and the bravery in speaking those deepest wishes aloud. 

For me,  I declare that I will choose my good...that will listen to that still small voice that tells me "No, this isn't what I want" and "Yes, go for this" and "Ask for it...you need/want it"...Do you know what I mean?  Some people tell me that it is about boundaries but it is more than that...it is me listening to and honoring me...yes, sometimes that means boundaries and other times it means something really different.  After I made this declaration and shared my artistic expression of that vow, the universe gave me the gift of practicing what I asked for.  I was asked for help on something that I really didn't feel that I could support.  Normally, I would have just "sucked it up" and helped but this time I said,"No, I cannot help you.  You are welcome to make this choice for yourself and for me, I am not going to put any energy towards it"...It was phenomenal and an example of how we are constantly supported in moving towards what we desire.

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I took this photo a few days ago while watering my garden.  I saw this beautiful strawberry, large and luscious, hanging from its stem and wanted it to be ready now...I had to stop and laugh at myself and say thank you to the garden for teaching me once again about patience...temperance...balance.  It's easy to want what I want when I want it but sometimes it is time to wait.  Remember that beautiful bible passage...To everything there is a season...a time to reap, a time to sow...well,there is also a time to wait and be patient.  This is such a struggle for me sometimes.  And so I sat and looked at this berry for a while.  I thought about time for action and time for waiting. I thought about forcing life and letting life come to me.  Who knew that all of that was waiting for me in a beautiful strawberry.
For me, the question has always been...is now the time to act?  time to wait?  I find that sometimes I miss out on things because I am too patient and then other times I find that I've, once again, forced something into fruition and the resulting fall out is unpleasant.  Wouldn't it be wonderful if life showed us a strawberry like this so that we knew exactly when the time was ripe for action...well, the more I think about it...life does give us a way to know that the time is ripe for action...it is my inner guidance system...you know what I'm talking about.  That feeling that says...go, go now!  I had that feeling recently about the workshops I'm offering and I know that they fill with ease.  If I had acted sooner when the feeling was "No, too much to divide my attention.  Too much unsettled feeling" then there wouldn't be movement.
So, once again, it is nature, my garden, or the animals that let me know what my lessons are.  Pay attention everyone...the messages are out there...even in a beautiful, luscious strawberry!
 
MOMMA LOVE! 05/19/2010
 
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Sand Tray work is one of my absolute favorite modalities of expressive art therapy.  It feels so much like entering in to a dream world.  It is filled with neat symbols and archetypes and quickly and easily helps me to make connections in my life.  Most recently,  I have done some work with Eileen (the homeopath that I have talked about in prior blog entries) that has led me towards some powerful revelations  When I have these experiences I usually like to  engage in some activity or ritual that honors the work that I've done.  So...I headed to the studio to let sand tray work its magic.  It was/is amazing to me how the lessons that I need to learn show up in this tray...lessons of boundaries and self love and gentleness.  These are good things for all of us to know.

Following the work in the sand tray, I headed off to the Teen Center where I consult.  I was prepared to do some animal totem work with them.  I found that the tray was still working on me as the animal/image that I was drawn to was this sweet momma and baby giraffe.  We used a technique in which the artist becomes the animal selected and gives it a voice.  We write in the first person about all that we see, feel, think, wonder, do...that kind of thing.  I wrote:

I am gentle.
I am tall.
I am a mom.
This baby is mine and I adore her
I nuzzle her with my cheek
I feel love, love flowing from the bottom of my tall, tall legs to the top of my long neck.
I wonder how she will grow.
I wonder if she sees how beautiful she is.
I am filled with Momma Love
All is calm
All is right
This is right where I am meant to be.

Once you finish writing from the animals point of view, the creator goes back to the words and lets the words that jump out at them direct their art.  The words for me were MOMMA LOVE.  And so I created a very simple piece to reflect this next lesson of the sand tray.
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I added these words to this sweet image:

Let me roll you up in my momma love,
safe and warm.
Let me show you the beauty
I see in you.
Snuggle into the
sweet
Momma
Love.




What a sweet lesson for me about the gift of letting the expressive arts show me what I need to know.  I love this work!!!! Can you tell?
 
 
My two lovely children have been battling a little with each other of late and while this may not seem like a topic for this expressive arts site....it is!  Both children complain that the other never listens to him/her.  They feel quite strongly that they would be happier if the other would only do what he/she wants them to do. Sound familiar?  I find that when am in a situation that feels bad to me, I've usually got a should story running.   Someone or  something is not as I deem it should be and of course, I am right.   Well,  how does that work for you?  Not so well  for me either.

Well....here is what I told my children.  When someone is bugging me,  I have to ask myself, ' what have I been focusing on'.  I used an example from a few years back when my husband and I were in a less happy place.  A friend asked me whether I was focusing more on what bothered me about my husband or more on what I loved about him.  The answer was a resounding...what bothers me.  Here's the truth:  What you focus on, you get!  That is just the way it is.  Here is the proof.  I sat down after that and wrote down all the things I loved about my husband. I read it in the morning, I read it during lunch,  I ready when I had a break, I read it in the evening and I especially read it when something was happening that I didn't like.  I talked, breathed, lived all that I loved about him.  With a little bit of effort and some dedication to focusing on what I loved, I got more of what I loved and less of what I  don't love.  Even now, when something happens and say for example, he takes a stronger tone than I love...he'll stop and apologize explaining that his level of frustration was over the top and he had to let it out.  So even the not so desirable is even easier to take.  My kids were surprised by this and a little resistant.  They wanted to be right more than they wanted to feel better.  I feel that way sometimes too.  I recently went through something where I didn't want to hear anything about shifting my focus and that sometimes there are situations that are just wrong...true, but if I hold on to it and hold on to it, then I am the one who suffers.  So try it,  Shift your focus and see what happens.  If you need help doing it,  create some art around it...the visuals are really powerful!!!!  Create art all about what you love about your partner, your life, your kids, your boss, your....  Then let the image fill your mind every time you find yourself in that situation.  See what happens. 

 
 
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This piece of art was created by one of the clients at the center where I work.  Collage is a common technique used in expressive arts but I have often thought about it as simplistic and possibly not all that interesting or complex.  When I looked at what this client did I was blown away.  His ability to use images from a variety of resources to create a cohesive and powerful image hit me square between the eyes.  He graciously gave this piece of art to me. 

He explained to me that he is the young figure in the center foreground of this piece and that his guide was behind him and eagle flew above him to help him in his recovery.  He is grounded in nature because that gives him strength and hope. 

I often hear from people that "troubled" kids can't do this kind of work or that they don't care.  It is my experience that they have deeper and richer life  experiences than most people I come in contact with.  They have more to overcome,oftentimes, but once they decide,  they are incredibly strong and determined.  This young man was just that sort of person.  He taught me never to set limits on what can be done within any medium or to limit what people could get out of that work. 

I am amazed each day by the places that this kind of artwork can take us.  I wish deeply that people  see that this process isn't about "art"....that the creativity is the gift that shows us where our work is and where to proceed.  This process takes us into places and shows us insights and connections that we might never be able to make with the use of our mind only.  I invite you to try some of these techniques:  collage, sand tray, sculpture....hold a question in your mind and then let your mind go.  Cut out images that call to you,  shape clay anyway that your hands want it to.  Don't think.  I promise you that there is a gift in it for you.  More to come...
 
 
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I've been sick for almost 3 weeks now...It's interesting.  When I was in Scotland there were walls everywhere.  I swear this country spent a great deal of energy taking stones and building these beautiful walls.  What struck me is the way that things grow in these walls...moss, ferns, flowers, ivy...you name it.  I especially love this photo of this tiny delicate fern growing in a wall on the walk up to Wallace Monument. 

Now what does this have to do with my being sick for 3 weeks...well, I believe that what grows in me is largely of my own creation.  I am a match for a sickness or I am not.  I manage to walk through flu and various other illnesses all the time without being touched by them.  There isn't "soil", if you will, for them to grow in.  This time was different.  I have been in a place where not just one illness but a variety of particularly nasty illnesses have taken hold.  It isn't a moral evaluation of my character but an acknowledgment of where I have been in my mind and in my heart.  And as I come out of this sickness, what will I learn from it?  Hence, my question,  "What do you want to grow?"  My mind and my emotions are tremendously powerful and I can work with them and train them towards my betterment or towards my 'victimhood'.  Which do I prefer?

A great Buddhist monk said, "It is our mind, and that alone, that chains us or sets us free."  It is my responsibility to work with my thoughts everyday, deliberately and consciously so that I reach for freedom and joy and consciousness.  I'm not looking for perfection here but rather, for being awake. 
It's a lot like one of my favorite sayings,  "You can't stop the waves from coming but you can learn to surf"  What do you want to grow?